Vanaprastha:Example of King Malayadhvaja and Queen Vaidarbhi

Reference Post for context: Activities of a Disciple in Separation from Spiritual Master

Srila Prabhupada's purport on vanaprastha life SB 4.28.45:

1. The wife especially should remain austere, not desiring luxurious dresses and living standards. She should accept only the bare necessities of life and minimize her eating and sleeping.
   
2. There should be no question of mating. Simply by engaging in the service of her exalted husband, who must be a pure devotee, the wife will never be agitated by sex impulses. The vānaprastha stage is exactly like this. Although the wife remains with the husband, she undergoes severe austerities and penances so that although both husband and wife live together, there is no question of sex. In this way both husband and wife can live together perpetually.
   
3. Nonetheless, the wife is expected to give up all luxurious habits. She should not even dress nicely or comb her hair. Hair combing is one of the main businesses of women. In the vānaprastha stage the wife should not take care of her hair. Thus her hair will become tangled in knots. Consequently the wife will no longer be attractive to the husband, and she herself will no longer be agitated by sex impulses.
   
4. In this way both husband and wife can advance in spiritual consciousness. This advanced stage is called the paramahaḿsa stage, and once it is obtained, both husband and wife can be actually liberated from bodily consciousness. If the disciple remains steady in the service of the spiritual master, he need no longer fear falling down into the clutches of māyā.

Example of King Malayadhvaja:

1. He was a powerful king and great devotee.
   
2. He was not attached when retiring from family life as we can see he divided his kingdom amongst his sons and then engaged in worship,executing austerities and following regulative principles in a solitary place(nirjana bhajan).SB 4.28.33
3. Practiced austerities and became equipoised in dualities.Austerities prescribed in the sastras help one transcend the material body.Sense control can be achieved automatically by engaging in the Lord's service. SB 4.28.37
4. He became fixed by following these principles for 36000 years.
   
5. He attained the perfection of life: Not only did he come to the conclusion that Krsna is everything but he also remained fixed in that realization.

Example of Queen Vaidarbhi:

1. She gave up all sensual enjoyment and in complete renunciation followed the principles of her husband, who was so advanced. Thus she remained engaged in his service.SB 4.28.43
2. Srila Prabhupada says in this regard:"If a woman is fortunate enough to be the wife of a pure devotee, she can serve her husband without any desire for sense gratification. If she remains engaged in the service of her exalted husband, she will automatically attain the spiritual perfections of her husband."
   
3. She remained austere, accepted only bare necessities of life, minimized her eating and sleeping and dressed in old garments.
4. While serving her husband the Queen did not even talk to her husband while serving.he would simply perform her prescribed duties without talk.This is evident from text SB 4.28.45
5. When she discovered her husband had left his body, she cried out of affection for him and she then prepared a blazing fire with firewood and placed the dead body of her husband upon it. When this was finished, she lamented severely and prepared herself to perish in the fire with her husband.SB 4.28.50
   

Activities of a Disciple in Separation from Spiritual Master

In SB 4.28 "Puranjana Becomes a Woman in the Next Life" -King Puranjana owing to excessive attachment to his wife and being engrossed in thoughts of worrying about her at the time of death, he is born as a woman in his next life. He takes birth as the daughter Vaidarbhi of King Vidarbha.

Vaidarbhi gets married to King Malayadhvaja and during vanaprastha follows her husband and serves him and performs austerities herself. Her relationship with her husband is compared with the relationship of the disciple with his Spiritual Master. The example and comparison teaches us at two levels:

1. Vanaprastha duties for wife and husband
2. Relationship of disciple with spiritual master

This post has been drawn out from Srila Prabhupada's purports on point 2.

Synopsis:
Making the order and mood of the spiritual master as one's life and soul is extremely important.
If one is successful in doing that one can imbibe the spiritual master's teachings and thus serve as an instrument in the mission of the spiritual master and Krishna.

If one fails to do that one will not be able to fulfill his duty as a disciple as enunciated below.
thus one should use one's life in training as per the guidance of the spiritual master and eventually fulfilling the spiritual masters preaching mission/desires in the process.

References from purports:

1. When one is trained by the spiritual master in devotional service, the disciple should allow the spiritual master to retire from active preaching work and engage in nirjana- bhajan. The disciple should take preaching activities in their own hands. SB 4.28.33
2. The disciple and spiritual master are never separated because the spiritual master always keeps company with the disciple as long as the disciple follows strictly the instructions of the spiritual master. When the spiritual master is no longer present one should serve his instructions just like when he is present one serves his physical body. SB 4.28.47
   
3. When an acarya disappears rogues and non-devotees take advantage and immediately introduce unauthorized principles. However the perfect disciples of the acarya try to relieve the situation by sincerely following the instructions of the spiritual master.SB 4.28.48
   
4. A devoted disciple of the spiritual master would rather die with the spiritual master than fail to execute the spiritual master's mission.To execute the will of the spiritual master , the disciple should be prepared to lay down his life and abandon all personal considerations.SB 4.28.51

Chaste wife: Srila Prabhupada's comments from the pastime of Arci

Refer synopsis and verses from Arci's dedication and devotion to Prthu Maharaj

1. Follows the husband in every situation:Being the wives of great personalities like Pṛthu, Lord Rāmacandra and Dhṛtarāṣṭra, Arci,mother Sita and Gandhari were ideal chaste women. Such queens also instructed the general people by showing them how to become a chaste wife and follow the husband in every stage of life. When the husband is king, she sits beside him as the queen, and when he goes to the forest, she also follows, despite having to tolerate all kinds of difficulties in living in the forest.4.23.19
2. Duty in householder life:The words bhartur vrata-dharma-niṣṭhayā indicate that a woman's duty, or religious principle, is to serve her husband in all conditions. In Vedic civilization a man is taught from the beginning of his life to become a brahmacārī, then an ideal gṛhastha, then vānaprastha, then sannyāsī, and the wife is taught just to follow the husband strictly in all conditions of life. After the period of brahmacarya, a man accepts a householder's life, and the woman is also taught by her parents to be a chaste wife. Thus when a girl and boy are united, both are trained for a life dedicated to a higher purpose. The boy is trained to execute his duty in accordance with the higher purpose of life, and the girl is trained to follow him. The chaste wife's duty is to keep her husband pleased in householder life in all respects, and when the husband retires from family life, she is to go to the forest and adopt the life of vānaprastha, or vana-vāsī. At that time the wife is to follow her husband and take care of him, just as she took care of him in householder life. But when the husband takes the renounced order of life, namely sannyāsa, the wife is to return home and become a saintly woman, setting an example for her children and daughters-in-law and showing them how to live a life of austerity.
3. Simply follow in footsteps of husband who is a devotee:A woman does not need to attain high qualifications, but if she simply follows in the footsteps of her husband, who must be a devotee, then both husband and wife attain liberation and are promoted to the Vaikuṇṭhalokas. This is evinced by the inconceivable activities of Mahārāja Pṛthu and his wife.

Arci's dedication and devotion to Prthu Maharaj

Prthu Maharaj retired from family life and entered the forest and strictly followed the regulations of retired life.His wife Arci also followed her husband to the forest as a chaste wife.

Synopsis:

1. She was a daughter of a king and was not accustomed to walking barefoot and living outside of the palace.
   
2. She tolerated all difficulties of living in the wilderness and followed the regulative principles of living in the forest like great sages.
3. Her body became very frail and thin by eating only fruits and leaves.
   
4. She did not feel any difficulties because she derived pleasure in the honor of serving her great husband
5. She lamented only for a little while, when her husband no longer displayed any symptoms of life( -dehino smin- sober person is not bewildered by such a change) .
6. She prepared his funeral pyre following all regulations and herself entered its flames
7. She thus served her husband just like the goddess of fortune serves Lord vishnu.
8. By dint of her chastity and pious activities she followed her great husband to vaikuntha.

Also refer Chaste wife: Srila Prabhupada's comments from the pastime of Arci

Reference texts:

SB 4.23.20: Although she was not accustomed to such difficulties, Queen Arci followed her husband in the regulative principles of living in the forest like great sages. She lay down on the ground and ate only fruits, flowers and leaves, and because she was not fit for these activities, she became frail and thin. Yet because of the pleasure she derived in serving her husband, she did not feel any difficulties.

SB 4.23.21: When Queen Arci saw that her husband, who had been so merciful to her and the earth, no longer showed symptoms of life, she lamented for a little while and then built a fiery pyre on top of a hill and placed the body of her husband on it.

SB 4.23.22: After this, the Queen executed the necessary funerary functions and offered oblations of water. After bathing in the river, she offered obeisances to various demigods situated in the sky in the different planetary systems. She then circumambulated the fire and, while thinking of the lotus feet of her husband, entered its flames.

SB 4.23.23: After observing this brave act performed by the chaste wife Arci, the wife of the great King Pṛthu, many thousands of the wives of the demigods, along with their husbands, offered prayers to the Queen, for they were very much satisfied.

SB 4.23.24: At that time the demigods were situated on the top of Mandara Hill, and all their wives began to shower flowers on the funeral pyre and began to talk amongst themselves as follows.

SB 4.23.25: The wives of the demigods said: All glories to Queen Arci! We can see that this queen of the great King Pṛthu, the emperor of all the kings of the world, has served her husband with mind, speech and body exactly as the goddess of fortune serves the Supreme Personality of Godhead, Yajñeśa, or Viṣṇu.

Desire to serve Vaishnavas should be stronger than a materialist's desire to enjoy Sense gratification

SB 4.22.3: Seeing the four Kumāras, Pṛthu Mahārāja was greatly anxious to receive them. Therefore the King, with all his officers, very hastily got up, as anxiously as a conditioned soul whose senses are immediately attracted by the modes of material nature.

Wife is adorned with fine garments and ornaments

Synopsis:

Its a wife's responsibility to be an inspiration and keep the husband's intelligence in good order so that they can carry on duties of grhastha asrama together peacefully.

SP's purport:
A woman is generally accustomed to dress herself nicely with fine garments and decorative ornaments. She may even sometimes wear flowers in her hair. Women especially dress themselves up in the evening because the husband comes home in the evening after working hard all day. It is the duty of the wife to dress herself up very nicely so that when her husband returns home he becomes attracted by her dress and cleanliness and thus becomes satisfied. In other words, the wife is the inspiration of all good intelligence. Upon seeing one's wife dressed nicely, one can think very soberly about family business. When a person is too anxious about family affairs, he cannot discharge his family duties nicely. A wife is therefore supposed to be an inspiration and should keep the husband's intelligence in good order so that they can combinedly prosecute the affairs of family life without impediment.

Reference text:
SB 4.27.2: The Queen took her bath and dressed herself nicely with all auspicious garments and ornaments. After taking food and becoming completely satisfied, she returned to the King. Upon seeing her beautifully decorated attractive face, the King welcomed her with all devotion.

Wife should not be neglected

King Puranjana neglected his wife and went for hunting. When he returned he found she was lying on the ground because she was neglected by her husband.
Srila Prabhupada writes in this regard:

"The wife of King Purañjana was lying on the ground because she was neglected by her husband. Actually the woman must always be protected by her husband. We always speak of the goddess of fortune as being placed on the chest of Nārāyaṇa. In other words, the wife must remain embraced by her husband. Thus she becomes beloved and well protected. Just as one saves his money and places it under his own personal protection, one should similarly protect his wife by his own personal supervision. Just as intelligence is always within the heart, so a beloved chaste wife should always have her place on the chest of a good husband. This is the proper relationship between husband and wife. A wife is therefore called ardhāńganī, or half of the body. One cannot remain with only one leg, one hand or only one side of the body. He must have two sides. Similarly, according to nature's way, husband and wife should live together. In the lower species of life, among birds and animals, it is seen that by nature's arrangement the husband and wife live together. It is similarly ideal in human life for the husband and wife to live together. The home should be a place for devotional service, and the wife should be chaste and accepted by a ritualistic ceremony. In this way one can become happy at home."

Reference verse and purport:
SB 4.26.17: All the women addressed the King: O master of the citizens, we do not know why your dear wife has taken on this sort of existence. O killer of enemies, kindly look! She is lying on the ground without bedding. We cannot understand why she is acting this way.